My mom was terribly abused by her mom and our family is still suffering from the effects of her abuse every day I still believe in the principles of feminism. prioritizing the person giving birth and maternal rights still need fighting for but that only applies to situations where the parent is not abusive.

Okay. Forget abuse. What about situations where the mother, while not abusive, isn’t fit to be a parent for whatever reason? Be it drug addiction, mental illness, just incompetency in general, whatever. 

What about sons? There are certain things that mothers can’t teach them. After a certain age, they will need their fathers to help them how to navigate issues like male puberty, male sexuality, male intimate hygiene, and such. 

Or just maybe, there are things the mother cannot do or doesn’t know, which the father compensates for, and thus the child is raised better because they can get the good from BOTH parents. 

How about instead of assigning parenthood based on biology, we assign parenthood based on the child’s needs and the family situation? And most importantly based on merit?