I never thought I’ll ever make this kind of a post but things have become fucking horrible now. Read till the end and fucking understand where I’m coming from before you jump to conclusions.
Lesbians deserve better. We do. We are as much a part of the LGBT community as the rest of the letters but in the recent months, this is probably because now I have come to terms with the fact that I’m a lesbian after years of trying to not accept it, I have started to actually notice all the hate towards the lesbian community.
And here’s the thing before I realised I was part of the lesbian community I used to think that lesbians were blowing things out of proportion but GUESS WHO GOT PROVEN WRONG.
After seeing that post made by that bitch blog I realised just how fucking disgustingly the LGBT community is treating lesbians. How people are shaming us for our sexuality. “Lesbian” is not a spectrum. Lesbian is a standard experience of being exclusively attracted to women. WOMEN.
people do not understand that lesbians have boundaries like everyone else. If you know what boundaries are then this post is not @you.
Lesbians for years have done all they can to shape the LGBT community while also fighting against every oppressive law placed on women. This is not an extravagant claim it’s reality and we are not given the credit we deserve and I’m not even complaining about that I’m just baffled by the disrespect being shown to us even in 2018. Why are our anatomical rights being questioned? Why is us choosing to or choosing not to date trans women for whatever reason being put up for debate. I don’t see the same questions and hostility being directed towards straight women or gay men for not wanting to date trans men nor do I see it directed towards straight men for not wanting to date trans women so why the fuck do you think lesbians should be subjected to this kind of scrutiny?
It’s nottransmisogynistic to want to have complete authority on our body.
And no I’m not a fucking terf trying to attack trans women but anyone with two brain cells knows that if a woman doesn’t want a dick in her then you don’t fucking guilt trip her into putting a dick in her.
This is exactly what it is. Fucking guilt tripping and anyone who is allowing it is a fucking enabler. Saying either you 1) accept trans women in your dating pool regardless of if she has what you want or not or 2) you get called a bigot who is a violent transphobe for respecting her own boundaries.
No it’s not “reducing someone to their genitals” it is “respecting your own body and your choices”
And let me fucking remind you here this doesn’t exempt you if you are a sexual abuse victim, I’ve seen this used as a “get out for free card” usually along the lines of “how can you say this is rape rhetoric I’m a rape victim” THEN YOU SHOULD UNDERSTAND MORE JUST HOW IMPORTANT ACTUAL FUCKING NON COERCIVE CONSENT IS.
This should not be even up for debate. What I do with my body is not up for debate. I don’t need to have had a traumatic experience or any kind of penis repulsion to justify not wanting to fuck a dick. I just don’t want to fuck a dick. No is a complete sentence. I don’t have a need to justify my sexuality.
“Oh but what about post-op trans women you Terf” I still hold the right to choose who I want to have a relationship with. It’s still not up for debate. My body is not up for debate.
“hahaha this never happens”
This was taken from a popular post on Facebook by a cis lesbian who didn’t want to have sex with trans women but wasn’t transphobic to the slightest. I can post multiple screenshots of open homophobia directed towards lesbians like this one. Yes it’s homophobia because these people think they have the right to dictate how a lesbian experiences her sexuality. You don’t.
Ive seen lesbians being demonized by the LGBT community just for our existence, we’ve been called predatory and disgusting. Butch lesbians have been called gross. I’ve internalised this shit to the point that I’ve had multiple panic attacks after coming to terms with my sexuality. And after that I was given more shit for not wanting to date trans women. I’m sick and tired of it. I’m sick of people thinking that my body is their’s to dictate. I’ve sick of people thinking I should bend my attraction to suit their interests.
Every single “queer” out there needs to fucking realise that lesbian is not a fucking spectrum. Every single “queer lesbian” needs to understand that all our experiences are not the fucking same and you don’t get to put other lesbians down because our boundaries are different from yours.
Every person has different boundaries and every boundary needs to be fucking respected.
Lesbians deserve better.
My body is not a political playground
There is a difference between respecting someone while not being attracted to them and hating them. If a lesbian doesn’t want to sleep with a trans girl that’s her wish as long as she isn’t hateful to the trans girl about it.
You can respect someone while also not being attracted to them, it’s not a difficult concept.
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