shes right and she should say it
excerpt from the article
The female price of male pleasure by Lili Loofbourow“At every turn, women are taught that how someone reacts to them does more to establish their goodness and worth than anything they themselves might feel.”
“But next time we’re inclined to wonder why a woman didn’t immediately register and fix her own discomfort, we might wonder why we spent the preceding decades instructing her to override the signals we now blame her for not recognizing.”
OK, yes, it’s a thing that happens, but it also happens to be exactly the thing radfems would say to argue that anyone disagreeing with them is a poor brainwashed being who’s too deluded to see what’s good for herself.
And yet we take men’s signals at face value, praise men for stoicism, punish them for weakness, and even make up terms like “man flu“ do discourage them from going to the doctor and to make them neglect their health, making them die years earlier.
Not that OP describes doesn’t happen to women. Of course it does. But this is a sophisticated version of the “cool girl” rant, and it has the same problem. It takes the inside view on female behaviour and explains it away through complex outside incentives and social pressures, and then blames male behaviour on men.
Also the passive voice does a lot of work there.
Like, as a man who heard “women are more just emotional/you just have to learn to live with it/expecting women to be cold and rational like men is low-key sexist“ instead of “THIS IS ABUSE GET OUT NOW FOR GOD’S SAKE” I have to say this:
That linked post features a lot of quotes by women about what they assume the male perspective to be. That post has a woman taking the experiences of a gay man with other men and pathologising them! And the woman just assumes that when women talk about bad sex it’s always a crisis, but that men can’t have bad sex.
But no, dishonest female behaviour is blamed on the Big Other, some implied and assumed male threat, done for male pleasure. I am doing this for you. You made me do it. The oranges of conclusively diagnosing an abnormal growth of endometrium outside the uterus are compared to the apples of selling a guy boner pills waiting to see if it helps and he buys more.
[…] the gender that walks around in sartorial comfort[…]
I can’t even. Don’t tell me a suit and tie is more comfortable than a cashmere sweater.
That whole article is “women have it hard therefore men don’t“ over and over.
TL;DR: “When women want mens attention and therefore decide to compete with other women, that’s actually men’s fault.”
Slightly longer: Listen, if I have been “trained” to see Oscar-worthy sartorial performances as routine, it’s because you routinely perform them in front of me. I didn’t ask for that. Maybe solve your own problem.
“But I can’t stop, then you’ll pick the woman who is doing that and therefore looks better.”
That sounds like a “you” problem.

