You are absolutely not going to be absolutely gaga over each other every single day for the rest of your lives, and all this ‘happily ever after’ bullshit is just setting people up for failure. They go into relationships with these unrealistic expectations. Then, the instant they realize they aren’t ‘gaga’ anymore, they think the relationship is broken and over, and they need to get out. No! There will be days, or weeks, or maybe even longer, when you aren’t all mushy-gushy in-love. You’re even going to wake up some morning and think, “Ugh, you’re still here….” That’s normal! And more importantly, sticking it out is totally worth it, because that, too, will change. In a day, or a week, or maybe even longer, you’ll look at that person and a giant wave of love will inundate you, and you’ll love them so much you think your heart can’t possibly hold it all and is going to burst. Because a love that’s alive is also constantly evolving. It expands and contracts and mellows and deepens. It’s not going to be the way it used to be, or the way it will be, and it shouldn’t be. I think if more couples understood that, they’d be less inclined to panic and rush to break up or divorce.
Absolutely spot on.
Love is not the corny mush sold on the television. It is not sex. It is not attraction.
Love means: discipline, fidelity, sacrifice, duty, patience, resilience, and consistency. These values have fallen out of fashion, characterised by the powers that be as being oppressive, restrictive.
This is false. Demonstrating the above values shows strength of character, and allows the love to grow and grow over a lifetime. Simply wandering into a relationship full of surface level desires, namely a false view of freedom revolving around the self, rather than selfless giving to the other, will end in disaster, as so many have discovered.
Also another addition that most people don’t talk about but I’ve experienced it.
The corny mush sold on TV doesn’t just apply to love, it applies to all relationships. Like people thinking friendship is 100% happy, people thinking children and parents should always get along and parenting is easy.
And there are some people who desire the “corny TV love”, in any relationship so desperately that they will try to create it by any means necessary. And by any means, I mean ANY MEANS.
The girlfriend who screams at you if you don’t text back in 10 minutes, the parent who guilt trips their child for disagreeing with them once, the friend who tries to gaslight you into caring for them 24/7 even at your own risk, the boyfriend who threatens your male friend because he thinks you’re cheating, all these people feel that they deserve “corny TV love.” And they will do anything, even destroy their object of love physically and mentally, to get it.
If someone expects to be gaga in a relationship all the time, it might be a potential sign of an abuser and you have to get away, far away, before you get hurt.
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